The Wailing Heard Around The World!

Did you hear it yesterday? There was a wailing that beset and enveloped the globe yesterday. Facebook and Instagram was missing in action! And panic quickly ensued and consumed the hearts and minds of billions. Scientists were quickly scrambling to see if the earth suddenly stopped spinning. Is the Zombie Apocalypse about to happen? Is the world about to end? Is our Sun about to go super nova and all people have worked so hard for about to become a black hole? Are the stock markets about to crash? And how can they express their pain of not having Facebook if there is no Facebook?

I mean, how will their thousands of “friends” know what they had for lunch? How will their “friends” know how unfair life is treating them. How will they discover their next “life hack”? How will their “friends” know where they are, what they are seeing? How in the world will they communicate with their “friends”? How will their function without their beloved “Facebook Fact Checkers”?

And we thought 2020 was the most horrible year of all. But oh such dark hours on Monday, the fourth of October of 2021. So many were left befuddled and confused. What use is there for their phones if Facebook and Instagram aren’t working? Many were feeling a deep emptiness and a crushing and devastating darkness consuming their lives. I wonder if suicide crisis lines were being overwhelmed with calls.

But then, just as mysteriously as it disappeared, Facebook and Instagram were back. The clouds began to part–they were reunited with their “friends”. And now everyone will know the despair and pain they felt in those dark, dark, ominous hours when “there was no Facebook and Instagram”!

Well, guess what, Buttercup? The world kept on spinning. The stock markets didn’t crash. Your “friends” survived not know what you were eating or where you were at. The sun didn’t go super nova and a black hole didn’t happen. But for some time to come they will ask the question with a tear still in there eyes, “Do you remember where you were on 10-4?”